Saturday, 30 March 2013

Life Changing Day....

On 28th March two things happened.  The day started out pretty yucky; improved slowly with some lovely moments and finished on a major crescendo.

Firstly Katie was sick and missed her Easter Bonnet Parade at school.  I think I was more disappointed than she was if I'm honest as I'd put some serious Mummy energy into making that damn bonnet! I thought it was quite good until I saw some of the other creations.  For heavens sake parents these kids are in RECEPTION YEAR!! This isn't the Tate Modern!  Go and bake some cakes or something.......

I digress.......Katie was sick during the evening whilst I was enjoying myself at my Reiki group.  She is very adept at timing her distresses for times when I'm out enjoying myself *raises eyebrows at the little monkey*.  Daddy had the nice job of dealing with a bed (and his T-shirt) of vomit and I got the nice job of coming home and putting it all in the wash and then having a night of very broken sleep with added vomit so don't feel too sorry for Daddy.  Poor Katie. It is so scary being sick when you are little. She gets so distressed.  I was able to snuggle her up in my arms all night and keep her warm whilst she kicked the covers off and fidgetted.  She's still not right, bless her little heart, but she's getting better (although producing some incredibly offensive odours from her derriere!).  She's organising her care package with organisational skills I should be proud of (other than the fact that it's me who's delivering the package!).

Thankfully she wasn't sick again on Thursday and we had a lovely Mummy+Katie day of mooching (yes I saw an opportunity to start teaching some mooching skills). I painted her nails; we baked some brownies for our Social Workers visit later in the day; we pottered up to the shops. It was actually a lovely day, despite the odd rush to the toilet.

Around 5.30pm our new Matching Social Worker arrived closely followed by our Assessing Social Worker to start our handover meeting.  Katie was delighted when our ASW presented her with a Lindt Chocolate Bunny (Mummy is under strict instructions NOT to eat it!) and Katie excitedly presented her with a lovely little mug we had found with a cat and dog sharing Dalmatian spots.  We love our cats and our ASW has dogs so we thought this was a very apt gift.  It was a fairly small mug as we know that SWs rarely get to finish a cuppa!

We had a little bit of chitchat and finally I asked our MSW "So, what happens next then? Are we just waiting for the phone to ring or is there anything else we need to do?"  I knew what her reply was going to be and I couldn't wait any longer for her reply which was

"Well actually I'm here instead of a phonecall".

I held my breath, anxious to see if what she was going to say was going to "match" the premonition I had had some time ago.  It did.  We have a match and it is a perfect match for our family.  I'm going to have to leave you dangling for a while until I am able to say more but I will say that we will soon be welcoming a very small member into the Katie family who might have a tendency to wear blue (or the various shades of brown and green that designers seem to like for a certain sex of child).  Our MSW asked if we needed time to think about it but Daddy and I both know that this is the right match for us, and Katie, and need no time to think any further.

We heard as much information as our MSW (who also seems very nice) was able to give us and arranged a meeting to discuss things further with the child's SW on 8th April.  We already know the SW because she was Katie's SW several years ago and we've had ongoing contact with her over the past 3 years.  It is all falling into place. Katie will feel relaxed with her, as do we, and this will help things along wonderfully I feel.

I've drip fed Katie some information. I've told her that our new SW thinks she may be able to find her a baby brother (sssshhhh I've said it).  Katie's face lit up and her excitement matches mine.  I've said we'll need to wait a bit longer until we get some more news but we're having little conversations. Just enough for a 5 year old to manage.

Since the meeting on Thursday I have been riding a wave of emotion. Mostly excitement until a friend of mine sent me an email of all the things I was going to need to buy and learn. Katie was 2 when we adopted her so bottles and teething and weaning are new things to us.  It's going to be a fun learning curve I think.

When we were matched with Katie, I was really unwell. I was anxious. I didn't know how to trust my instincts regarding a match.  Daddy was the one who "knew" that Katie was right for us.  This time I am all systems go. I feel it in every fibre of my being.  I am already bonded emotionally with this child.  The bolt of emotion has been allowed to flow.

I'm in!  

I'm caught....

Hook, Line and Sinker.

The MSW has said we can move things along as quickly or as slowly as we would like.  There are still some uncertainties that need to be addressed.  We still have some building work upstairs to sort out.  I can't imagine we would start introductions quicker than in 2 months because we have to meeting with the Medical Adviser and Foster Carers and go to Matching Panel.  The system can only work so quickly.  I will know more on the 8th but we have said that we want to move as quickly as is possible to minimise the time spent in Foster Care.  Until then I'm going to be bouncing about in a mix of excitement and panic about how much I'm going to need to achieve and buy.

Bring it on, I can't wait!  What a life changing day......






23 comments:

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    1. Thank you. We are excited but sad that another baby needs to be placed for adoptionxx

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  2. Congrats - very exciting! People who tend to wear blue, green, and brown are fun ;)

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    1. Looking forward to adding some of those colours to our very pink house lol! Xx

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  3. Oh my gosh! I've got all goose-pimply reading this. So exciting! :-) x

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    1. Thanks honey!! It is very exciting for us all. Katie is planning what she is going to do with her brother (hopefully all positive!). xx

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  4. So pleased for you. And don't let anyone rain on your parade (I've been reading your twitter feed!). It is something to be celebrated not just for you but for your baby too. Looking forward to reading more about an exciting bit of your journey x

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    1. Sally - thank you. Don't worry, there's no raining and there were some valid points in between some of the stuff that I have taken on board. I fully intend to celebrate. Katie is desperate for her new Build A Bear who will choose a new one with her brother when he arrives. I can't wait until I can tell her all the details. x

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  5. fantastic news after all the hassle you have had in getting to panelt

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    1. Isn't it just? We did wonder if there was a bit of stalling going on but this shows the whole rollercoaster that is the adoption process. Lots of plodding around waiting for the ride to get going and then suddenly you're upside down and screaming with all the excitement!! LOL xx

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  6. I have a lump in my throat reading this - I'm so happy and excited for you. I hope it goes really quickly. Good luck with everything xxxxx.

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    1. I have a feeling it's "hang onto your hats" time and this is going to move very fast. I'm ready today (except that I don't have anything for a baby in the house yet!). We now need to get all the building work done in record time......that might need more luck than anything else I suspect! LOL xx

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  7. I am so, so happy for you!!!!!

    We have so many baby boy clothes (in fact we have boys clothes up to the age of 18-24 months as Oscar is already in 2-3 years) that you are more than welcome to if you want them? I couldn't bear to part with them earlier because the thought of not adding to our family was too much. But they are just sitting in the loft in black bags and boxes and I'd feel so much happier passing them on to someone who has waited so long for the newest addition to their family.

    You'll have to let me know what you need (send me an email sometime). Are you going to BritMums Live this year? If so (and if you do want some of the clothes - you're obviously more than welcome to say no, I won't be offended!) then it might be a good time to pass them on when we're both down London way!

    Ooooh, I am so very excited for you! xx

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    1. Had another IPad moment with this as well when I tried to say thank you and I'd love to speak to you more about this, but then my IPad refused to let me amend a mistake and I ended up with half the text missing!

      Yes I am going to Britmums this year (all being well and little one being settled) even if I only make it up for the day. I've got all my accommodation booked on a refundable basis so that's all ok. I am thinking I might drive up to give me more flexibility about getting home again so I would have boot space if there were things you are happy to pass on. A huge thank you in advance!! x

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    2. Sorry I'm late in replying (between infections and antibiotics for me and Oscar and a lack of sleep, I am a bit behind!!)

      I shall get Tim to go up in the loft and bring down all of Oscar's clothes and I'll go through them and see what we have... you are more than welcome to anything. Is there anything in particular you're needing/looking for or just whatever we have? (email me what sizes you'll need clothes from and I'll try and make sure I match them to the season your little boy will likely be wearing them in!)

      We're giving the majority of our equipment to my "sister" (not my sister but as good as!) so I haven't got much spare but we do have a few things we doubled up on (eg we were given one cot mobile but then bought a different one, so if you needed a cot mobile we will have a spare if I can find all the pieces to them both). Incidentally, my sister is having a girl so we have an abundance of clothes ;)

      Hope you manage to get to BritMums as would be great to catch up and I could bring much more that way, but if you don't manage it I can still post a few bits to you!

      Anyway email me (try sending it to amanda[dot]shortman[at]gmail[dot]com as that is a quieter email address and I'm more likely to pick it up quicker there. Email me whenever you get the chance (I know you must be super busy right now!) and just let me know what you want/need. As I say it will be great to pass Oscar's things on to someone who will appreciate them :)

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  8. FANTASTIC NEWS :) That's brilliant. Can't wait to hear more about it. So nice to hear that all the stress and paperwork mishaps are worth it in the end.

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    1. Yes they are and we learned that last time round as well. It's what kept me sane this time round when we were stalled. I want to share it all so people going through the process can see all the fits and starts and see that there is an end point. xx

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  9. Such a pity my original more spontaneous comments got lost in the ether! Because I smiled SO MUCH reading this entry - smiling with tears in my eyes at all times!!! I am so excited with you and for you - I'm in too! Caught - hook, line and sinker and I can't WAIT to meet Katie's little brother!!! I hung back with Katie, thinking she needed to have t-i-m-e and s-p-a-c-e to meet everyone but I am officially applying here and now to be bumped up the list this time!!! LOL!!! Let's put a date in . . . . .!!! x

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    1. LOL Berni!! You are very high up the list. As you know Katie loves you and your lovely hubby (even if I don't recognise him in a hat!). I'm sure we will be more relaxed this time round as well once the little one has settled in. Once I know the "when" I will sort out a date with you although would be happy to have another Thai meal before then as long as Katie doesn't loose another tooth in the process! xx

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    2. loose a tooth? hmmmm it's currently loose but we don't want her to lose it!

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